I’ve had a chance to sleep and collect my thoughts.
I need you to know that I still love you.
I know I was totally wrong to react under stress the way I did.
My problem is that I can’t cope with my anxiety and paranoia.
The Maggie you get sometimes is not the real me.
But all these are just attempts at excuses for something that was inexcusable.
I’m sorry that I destroyed our relationship.
You know I dreamt of a New Year with you. Going somewhere like The Riverside and kissing you in public, at the stroke of midnight, to show the world that we were a special couple.
I dreamt of getting my own little place near you to be able to see you a few times a week either at yours or mine so we could be lovers and friends in a way that would not cause you problems with family or friends.
Still that’s a fantasy as all dreams are now my world with you has come crashing down.
I’m not asking you to reconsider as I’ve caused you too much hurt and it’s best you find someone younger and less complex than me.
But I wanted you to know what I really think about you.
The Gravesham housing application forms arrived today – just made me cry…